365 Day Photography Challenge- Day 7- Quality Time with the Puppy

When I’m at school it’s very hard to find quality time to spend with my puppy Rambo. He isn’t even two yet and I got him after my first dog, Sally, had to be put down at the age of 18. For a few months after we lost Sally, I felt empty. I had always had a dog. My family had adopted Sally from the RSPCA when I was only six years old and so we had grown up together, I barely remembered a life without her.

The months went by and I finally convinced my mum that we should get another dog. I adopted Rambo from the RSPCA in December of 2009 and he has been part of the family ever since. My mum loved him, my dad loves him, he is one of us. Throughout this year, after the loss of my mum, Rambo has become even more important to all of us. At times when we thought we would never smile again, Rambo was there, doing something crazy, making us laugh.

Today Rambo and I went for a walk/run and then he sat on my lap, all afternoon, in the air conditioning. I love Rambo and I am very grateful for all that he has done for my family and I this year.

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So this thing happened…

I know I have been absent for awhile. To be honest, I didn’t think I was coming back. And then this thing happened.

On the 4th of February, 3 days before my 25th birthday, my mum died. Died still sounds like such a harsh word but I hate all the euphemisms. I hate passed away. I hate moved on. I especially hate is with god now.

I will not lie, it has been the hardest thing I have ever experienced. It was unexpected to say the least. She had a massive heart attack and no one even saw a glimpse of it coming. I felt like my chest was going to burst open and my heart would just fall to the floor and you know what? I didn’t even care. I didn’t care who I hurt, who I left behind, who would care that I was gone. I didn’t care one bit because all I wanted was my mum to be back.

I think about her everyday. Everyone says that don’t they? When someone dies, “Not a day goes by when I don’t think about them”. I never thought it was true, I always thought, there has to be one day when you don’t think about them. It’s true.

Today my head teacher asked me to take on more responsibility at school, to look at becoming second in charge in the faculty. The first thing I thought after hell no…was I gotta tell mum. Then I remembered. Mum isn’t here anymore.

People say it gets better.

People say.